Some people love dominance and submission. That may be their entire kink, or it may be part of their kinkiness, intermingled with spanking, bondage, and more. Wikipedia puts it nicely:
Until quite recently, I thought that I was interested in spanking, but not in dominance/submission. Perhaps I acted dominant but that was just a necessary part of the spanking, it wasn't really part of my kink persona . . . or so I thought.
I know better now. One of the reasons I was slow to recognize my own dominance is that women come to me primarily to be spanked, not to be dominated, at least not explicitly. Also, I have a strong commitment to consensuality, and dominance can blur questions of consent. When the spanker acts dominant, it can be harder for the spankee to object to something she does not want. It took me time to learn how to express my spanking dominance while remaining in touch with how the woman is experiencing the spanking and respecting her right to modify or stop the scene.
Spanking dynamics vary greatly from one person to the next. Some people love administering spankings for a reason, and their spankings are filled with reprimands for misconduct and admonishments to do better in the future. For no particular reason, this particular dynamic isn't part of my normal routine. I love to punish women, not for any particular reason, but for the pure joy of the experience.
However, my spankings are more than hard bottom-slappings; I mix other elements with the stock of punishment. One element is a sense of dominance that grows from one spanking session to the next. This dominance makes the spankings better. And with some women I eventually move to no-safeword spankings; this infuses a spanking with incredible excitement. Please understand that no-safeword spankings are controversial and must be undertaken with great care; I discuss this topic at length elsewhere on this site.
I make some women (not all) masturbate during their spankings, and my dominance is an important part of that sexual dynamic.
And how does this all work out for the women involved? I'll let steph speak for herself. The topic is on her mind, since she's scheduled for another visit soon, and we've been talking about my need to hurt her and to make her masturbate in front of me. Tonight she wrote:
I love your boldness in, not just expressing these things, but in doing them. Having the courage to take me to the point I really want to go, with pain and punishment, with sexuality,...... places I might resist, not out of lack of desire, but other things. This puts me to into a thirsty state where I just want more, of everything......... I feel like I have so much control in the rest of my life that when you give me no control like that, it is so invasive and so consuming. That isn't just something I want right now, it is something I need.