This story is not just painful; it's awful. I include it because any honest discussion of spanking must acknowledge the possibility of things going wrong. They don't go wrong because of anything magic (or toxic) about spanking itself; they go wrong for the same reasons anything else goes wrong in our lives: people not listening to each other, not believing each other, getting intoxicated, and so forth.
The centerpiece of this story is a moment when two lovers find their relationship destroyed by a nonconsensual spanking. But the events leading up to this spanking, and the disaster that follows, are equally compelling.
It's a sobering reminder, if one is needed, of the vital importance of consent and the need to proceed with caution if you are going to play at consent's edges.
I'll let Mary speak now.
Doc
Dear Doc,
My name is Mary. I've been reading the accounts of spankings that went too far in your Over the Top section and thought you might be interested in hearing about my own experience. It happened over 30 years ago, but it was such a traumatic experience for me that it is still unfortunately affecting my life today.
Some people probably only consider the intensity of a spanking as determining whether it is over the top or not. My spanking is about intensity, but it goes beyond that. My spanker blundered into an emotional minefield. I'm not sure you will understand why I was so deeply affected unless I give you the background for it. Some of this has nothing to do with spanking at all, but I hope it will explain why the experience had such a negative impact on me.
I'd like to tell you my story in four parts. The first will introduce myself and explain, I hope, the reason my over the top spanking was emotionally damaging . The second part is the story of an event I witnessed as a child that led to the formation of a phobia. The third is the story of the spanking that I found so devastating. And the fourth tells what happened afterward that has led to over three decades of guilt and remorse.
Please understand . . . spanking has always been an important part of who I am sexually. I still have a craving to be spanked. This goes to prove that when you are a hard-wired spanko, it is nearly impossible to override your impulses. Spanking is at the center of my sexuality today. I love spanking . . . but even for someone who loves spanking, things can go wrong . . .
Mary