Ella first wrote me on Wednesday March 11 to say she enjoyed my web site. She is an impecunious college student, so for her to travel to Houston was out of the question. But she told me where she went to college, and I said, funny thing, I’m going to be in your area in just eight days. It was quite a coincidence, although not so very strange, when you think of it, since I regularly get e-mails from women who don’t live where I am going to be visiting. Once in a while their location and my traveling plans are bound to connect.
Eight days isn’t a lot of time to establish the comfort, and the trust, that are necessary for a successful spanking experience. But we did it! We emailed, quite a lot, in those first few days. And we agreed that after I arrived at her campus, that we’d have lunch and see how things felt. There was no commitment, on either of our parts, to go beyond that if we didn’t feel comfortable.
After I posted this, trish sent me an insightful note, capturing in a few words an important part of the dynamic -- about how a woman who wants to please should interact with a man who has his own preferences.
Doc--
I deeply understand Ella's desire to please, since I have it as well, although it is complexly coated with both bravado and an inner sense of power that I still don't understand. But I know that the desire to please can be a trap for young women, or actually for women of any age. I'm glad that you are encouraging her to let you know what she does and does not want; that although she is submissive, she need only submit to things that please her, and she need never let herself be humiliated. She needs to carry this lesson with her in life, especially in the kink arena, but in others as well. It will serve her well.
--trish
Beautifully said, trish. Thank you!
Back to Ella . . . if you want to learn more about Ella and my negotiations, this section is for you. If you just want to listen to Ella’s spankings, you can fast forward to the next section, Ellas Introduction.
I’ll turn it over to Ella now.
--Doc