Two years ago, I stumbled upon a spanking site or two on Myspace and my world of what I thought was just fantasy, opened up into reality. Regular folks liked to be spanked, over the knee, bare bottom spanking. I chatted with some of the spankers and spankees I found there and was so happy to talk to someone and I didn’t have to feel embarrassed about what I desired – a good old spanking. I was then hungry for more information and came upon Doc’s site – wow. In all the sites I had visited, never had I found such thorough and encouraging information. It became my guide into the world of spanking.
I started emailing Doc in November 2007. Loaded with many questions, he answered them all. When I was asking about what to look for in a top, his words from one of the earlier emails would one day come to fruition. “It’s more important that he’s someone you feel safe with and someone that’s honest. But you’re right that if the guy is into bondage and dominance, but not really into spanking, THAT will NOT work. Spanking has to be important to him, or he won’t be spanking you much, no matter what he promises in an e-mail.”
Over the next year and a half I kept talking to spankers/spankees and reading and enjoying Doc’s site. I enjoyed Sue’s Reclaiming the Fire and how she went about finding her Top. I joined a variety of sites and chatted with dozen of spankers, some scared me and some who were sincere were too far away. I really didn’t think I would ever find the right person.
It wasn’t until 2009 that I moved to a bigger city where I had more opportunity to find a Top. Doc’s site suggested joining Alt.com or Bondage.com, but I just didn’t feel comfortable at those sites. I wanted a spanker; however, I wasn’t into BDSM. Someone had suggested Fetlife because it was much more open to kink discussion than Myspace (no surprise!) so, I joined. Lots of conversations started, I was taking all Tops/Doms with a grain of salt. I was always nice to everyone who sent me a message and to those with obvious BDSM profiles I made it very plain that I was just into spanking.
Then one day, B sent me a message that we had messaged each other before and he wanted to chat. I checked out his profile and saw that he was into a D/s scene more than spanking. I sent him a one liner, I’m not a submissive, and I’m more into just spanking. He came back to answer me that he too was into spanking (hmmm what did Doc say in Nov 2007 about promising things in email), but the rest of his message was very nice explaining everything about himself. Perked my interest, I found him to be very reassuring with each question I asked. We emailed each other for a while and talked about getting together for my first spanking. However, it would be very important for us to meet over coffee and see how we both felt. In my mind, I was going OMG could this be it, could I have found the right Top.
I sent a quick email to Doc needing a Sanity Check email to make sure I hadn’t missed anything. I was both excited and nervous.
After the meeting, I sent this email to Doc:
Hi Doc ... Met with my friend and it went really well. We talked about everything and he is a super person. Very intelligent and articulate -- which is a treat compared to some of the tops I've been talking to ... oy vey ... makes you wonder! So we had a great time and things are set for this weekend. I've very excited and very nervous (in a good way). I'm sure I'll be re-reading your site just to make sure I'm ready. I think I am ... the ironic thing is how close we live to each other. If this first time goes well, this could be the start of something very regular for me -- wow, 2 years ago I never thought it would happen and now, it is all falling into place.
Lisa